Thursday, February 23, 2017

The Principle of Being Trustworthy



Turn on the Television and you will see show after show all about couples seeing the need to hire individuals to follow and take notes on their spouse's daily activities. There are hidden cameras placed through out homes and offices, secret apps installed on technological devices to gain access to social media accounts and communication records, and a constant lingering question of whether or not a husband can trust his wife or if a wife can trust her husband.

And sadly, in most of those television show scenarios we find that there was just cause for the tracking down of a spouse. Trust is lost and often times the relationship is ended in an ugly and bitter manner.

But it doesn't have to be that way.

Today's passage, Proverbs 31:11-12 tell us that a marriage can and should be the exact opposite.

Proverbs 31:11-12 says,
The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will not lack anything good. She will reward him with good, not evil all the days of her life.

This woman is trustworthy. She is worthy of the trust that her husband has in her.


Defining Trustworthy

So what does being trustworthy mean?  Again we start by turning to Miriam-Webster to see what the basic definition of the word means. Miriam-Webster says that 'trustworthy' means 'worthy of confidence; dependable'

Not a bad way to describe this concept but I think that we can probably do a little bit better.  My professor, Dr. Pat Ennis, defined 'trustworthy' as
A firm belief or confidence in the honesty, integrity, reliability, and justice of an individual. 
Wow! There is so much packed into that little sentence. So let's break it down.

First of all lets look as "confidence." Confidence can be described as the quality or state of being certain. That is a great word picture. This means my husband can be 100% certain that he can trust me. Looking at the verse we see her husband's whole heart trusted in her. He was certain, completely.

The next word that needs to be unpacked is "integrity"  Integrity is best known as being complete, unimpaired, or perfect condition. It is also known as uprightness honesty, and sincerity. So again, looking back at our focus verse we see this woman's husband is 100% certain in his wife's unimpaired honesty and sincerity. He has no reason to question the things she says or the activities she participates in because she is walking in uprightness.

 The Character of a Trustworthy Woman

What does a trustworthy woman look like? 

First of all, her past dictates that her husband's trust in her is a reflex reaction. He doesn't even have to think or process through the trust he has in her. It just happens because there has never been any reason for him to not have his full faith in her. He has only ever received good things from her and the reputation that she carries in the community.

Secondly, because he has a reflex reaction to completely trust his wife there is no need to make provision for 'checking up' on her. He doesn't have to sneak around to see what she is doing, He doesn't feel the need to ask friends or others when out and about what they might have seen his wife up to. She knows that her actions have an effect on the character of her husband and children. If she is out roaming the town being untrustworthy she will be starving their character. On the other hand, if she is continually walking in uprightness she will feed their character and help to make them into the people God has intended them to be.

Developing a Trustworthy Lifestyle Within The Home

There are seven key areas that we can focus on to work toward cultivating a culture of trustworthiness within our homes. Those areas are security, service, encouragement and affirmation, nurturing a lifestyle of affirmation, nurturing a lifestyle of love, setting boundaries and limits, and nurturing a lifestyle of faith. Each one of these areas, when applied properly within the home, can instill a culture of trustworthiness for our husbands and families. When we provide security and put other's needs first our family knows we will always be there for them. When we nurture our culture of affirmation through encouragement and love our family is aware that we are their biggest cheerleader, knowing they can accomplish anything with God's strength. When we set boundaries we teach others that there are lines that can't be crossed. And lastly, when we nurture our lifestyle of faith others around us see that we can only accomplish any of these principles is through the faith we have in God.

Characteristics of Integrity

Integrity is a big key of this idea of being trustworthy so lets take a closer look at what the characteristics of integrity really are.

First of all, you have to have an attitude of excellence. You have to make it a priority to strive to have an attitude of excellence. When you are serving your family you have to remember that it is your ministry and we are to serve in our areas of ministry excellently.

Secondly, you are in a season of life. At some point that season will change, but no matter what we are to walk in diligence and faithfulness within that season. We need to be 100% present in the season not looking back longingly at what once was or looking ahead dreaming of what is to come. Planning for the future is fine, but not if it means that your entire focus will be drawn away from the present and the things that are happening now.

Third trait is is to make a choice for personal purity. And often times this requires finding a level of accountability. Having those people in your life that will hold you accountable helps to build and establish the trustworthiness that we are trying to cultivate.

Lastly, cultivating a consistent walk with the Lord. If your heart, mind, and lifestyle is tuned in and focused on the things the Lord has given you there will be no time, desire, or opportunity for the trust that has been built to be destroyed. When your walk with the Lord is strong and consistent it is easy to remain walking uprightly.

Final Thoughts

While this particular areas focuses a lot on the marriage relationship it is important to remember that you don't have to be married to develop a principle of trustworthiness. Bosses in the work place, individuals in leadership positions over you, and other types of relationship also need to have a level of trust in you. Your boss should know without a shadow of a doubt that you will perform your job duties to the best of your ability all the time. If you are under someone's leadership in church or other ministry organizations that person should know you are there to do what needs to be done. Trust is principle that is valuable no matter what your marital situation. 

Have you cultivated a lifestyle of trustworthiness in your life? Can those around you trust you completely? If not, how can you begin to develop that principle in your life today? Come back next time when we talk about the Principle of Being Energetic.


4 comments:

  1. What a lovely post. It's so important that we remain trustworthy and full of integrity for our spouse and those around us. Thank you for sharing. (:

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  2. Great reminder for today's woman! Trust is an attribute sorely lacking in our world. Thanks for your words. {Visiting today from #FaithFilledFriday where we're neighbors.}

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  3. Thank you so much for this encouraging and motivating post. I love the part about developing trustworthiness so your husband's trust in you is a reflex. Thanks!

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  4. A good reminder that what is actually ideal in our world today does not necessarily agree with what the bible teaches. This is especially so when it comes to the gold standard in marriage. We must always trust those we love. Thank you for sharing this.

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