Thursday, April 30, 2015

Friendships


In my house we watch a lot of little girl TV. One of my daughter's favorite shows to watch is "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic".  The other day I was watching one of the episodes with her and the conversations between the characters was about how things come and go in life but friendship never changes. I started thinking about that conversation and how, while it is just a cartoon, there was a flaw in the point.

I believe that God puts people in our lives for a reason. I know there is a saying that has something to do with people being permanent or being there just for a season. But nevertheless, people are in our lives for some type of purpose.

Last week someone who had been in my life for a very long time passed away. He was one of my very best friends throughout much of my school age years. He knew things about me that very few people knew. We told each other secrets, we leaned on each other during hard times. laughed and loved together for many years.

However, life does what life does and we both took different paths once we were out of school. Due to that we drifted apart. That doesn't mean that we were never in each others lives again. It just meant that our friendship changed. I met Dusty and he met his amazing wife. We began to depend on each other for different things. He wasn't the person who I told my secrets to anymore. And I wasn't the one he leaned on when things got hard. 

For the past few days I have really been struggling with how to process his passing. I have struggled with a level of guilt for not being around for him when things started getting worse. But then, as I really processed how life has changed for me over the past 10-12 years I realized that I was holding on to  guilt that isn't mine to hold onto. There is no real reason for it. I was there for him when he needed me but he didn't need me anymore. At least not in the same way. And that is something that I am glad for.

So I will remember him and the friendship I had. I will remember the person I knew, loved, and laughed with. And I will remember that friendships change and evolve, but that doesn't mean that they are no longer valid friendships or that they don't mean as much anymore. It just means that they are different. And that is the way it is meant to be.