Friday, August 23, 2013

Spent

Full time stay at home mom.
Full time wife of a seminary student
Active in on campus activities
Involved in children's ministry at church
and now,,,,

Seminary Student With homework. A LOT of homework.

I am exhausted. And its only been one day of  one class.

I'm starting to question my decision to take classes. Don't get me wrong. I love being in the classroom. I love learning and I'm excited to be doing so but there is so much to be done. Papers to write, books to read, meetings to attend, and housework to be done.

I'm struggling to find balance. I feel like if I take time to focus on homework or reading for class then I am neglecting the kids. On the other hand if I take time to focus on the kids and stop to play with Collin then I am neglecting both the house work and the homework.  Its like I'm constantly drowning and I can't catch a breath.

One of the biggest problems that I face is that I set HUGE high standards for myself. And I am a perfectionist. I will work at something until I feel like it is completely 100% right. I also feel like I should be able to do it all, all of the time. I have often said that if I could ever have a super power it would be to never need to sleep. A lot of the time I get frustrated that I have to stop to sleep or rest. I just want to be able to use those 5-7 hours that I sleep at night.  Silly I know but when your plate is as full as mine appears to be sleep tends to not be much of an option.

So long story short I am spent. I feel like my tank is so far past empty that its gonna take a lot to fill it back up.

Friday, August 9, 2013

Chicken Spaghetti

Tonight I made some delicious spaghetti for dinner with some left over chicken in the sauce. It was fabulous.
So I know what your thinking.  What's so special about spaghetti?  People make that all the time right?
Well its special because......
Wait for it......
I MADE THE PASTA FROM SCRATCH!!!
Let mw tell you its really not that hard. And with the exception of the drying time it doesn't take long to get done either.
It taseted great.
Half the amount I would normally eat filled me up faster than the store bought.
My kids LOVED it!
And I know exactally what my kids were eating (I made the sauce from scratch too but thats simething I've done for a while)
All in all dinner would he considered a huge success!

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Mommy delusions

Screaming
Blood-curddling, nails on a chalk board, gouge your eyes out screaming
That's the sound I hear every time I even think about walking out of the room while RaeLynn, who generally appears to be lost in her own little world, is in the same room as me.
Its as if she has some internak radar that goea if when I think to my self "I'll just go put this laundry away real quick."
HA! Ya right!
When this first started I wanted to beat my head against the wall. Who,  am I kidding, I still do. In sync with the screams. We could make beautiful music together.....or maybe not.
But then today, as I slowly walked down the stairs praying it would just end already, I started thinking maybe I am just the best mom ever!  Maybe I'm just so awesome that my beautiful babies just can't stand to be away from me.
Then again it could be that she really hates it when the attention isn't on her......
I think I'm going to live in my happy delusion and go with the first option.  Ya,  that will work.